ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I would fuck him just for his dog
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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