Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
