i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
So many bounce houses so little time
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Randomize
