And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
