Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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