just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
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