I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Randomize
