My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Everclear isn't food dammit
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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