Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
