Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
