the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
