wake up i wanna do it froggy style
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
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