ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
