Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
How many fucks given?
0.12846
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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