If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
