You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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