Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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