i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
