apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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