love makes seman taste better
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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