if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
