guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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