YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
