You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
he fucked my hip out of place.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
