she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
