Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
