At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize
