totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
