I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
