are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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