Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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