My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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