Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
