dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
