shes about as inviting as chlamydia
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
