my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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