what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
