I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
