didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Randomize
