I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
