If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
