I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
