Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
