Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
