okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize
