Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I just found puke in my bra..
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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