The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Randomize
