If that was your dad, he is hot
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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