He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
