plz talk dirty to me
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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